BLOGGER, CARTOONIST, CYCLIST, BEARD OWNER & NORTHMAN

DESCENDED FROM NORSE KINGS & NORMAN INVADERS

Sunday 21 September 2014

1409.21 I'M H-A-P-P-Y

I'm writing this whilst sitting in a chair next to my hospital bed in Kepple Ward of Rotherham General Hospital. I came in yesterday for surgery to fix my shoulder following a cycling accident 2 weeks ago.

The surgery was a doddle, I woke up in recovery with a completely numb arm and shoulder. I thought I'd probably sleep the majority of the rest of the day but surprisingly I felt quite alert. It was a good job I'd downloaded a couple of films onto my Nexus tablet.

Then came the longest night. They turned the lights off about half 10 (22:30) and I finished off my film. It was when I took out my earphones and settled down to sleep the problems started. The guy on the end bed (I'm in the far right corner) kept squealing in pain and the old chap next to me began snoring. I've slept through worse to I settled down best I could. I just began to doze when a nurse came to administer anti-biotic into the port in my left hand. Then at about half past midnight they brought in another patient who they placed diagonally opposite me. Staff were buzzing around him with a light above his bed and noisy diagnostic machines buzzing and beeping. After they left him he began to snore like a warthog.

With the sounds of other patients plus the staff dealing with other patients' needs added to the warm temperature of the ward meant a really poor night's sleep. I awoke at 6am when I believe there was a shift change. I was in a bit of pain and really uncomfortable. At half past a nurse came to check my vitals. I decided I might as well get up so got out of bed and read a magazine. The medication trolley came around and I got 2 caplets, 2 tiny pills and a giant pink one. Since then I've felt loads better. The tea trolley, which is a definite highlight, came half an hour ago and also breakfast shortly after (bran flakes).

I'm looking forward to going home (later today) and sleeping properly. Hopefully I'll be fully fit quickly, I have a bike gathering dust.

Note: The title of this entry may not be understood by younger readers. It refers to the theme song to a sitcom from the 80s set in a hospital.

Friday 19 September 2014

1409.19 A UNITED KINGDOM

I wake up this morning to discover that Scotland has decided to stay in our union and reject independence. I am glad that they are not breaking away, the loss I believe would have irreparably damaged the north of England by condemning us to potentially many years of Tory rule. I believe that the next stage is to look at the way the entire country is governed. How can the parliament that's so far away in the south-east know what's best for a society in the north? I'm hoping for a certain amount of devolution for the regions of England as enjoyed by Scottish people (which is now due to increase following the referendum) as well as the Welsh. A Yorkshire assembly perhaps? After all the population of Yorkshire is comparable to Scotland (5.3m compared to 5.29, source: Google). 

Saturday 6 September 2014

1409.06 A PROPER CYCLIST

They say you aren't a proper cyclist until you've broken your collarbone. Well thanks to some knobhead running out in front of me whilst riding home from work on Thursday night I can now say I'm a proper cyclist.

I was last out of the office as usual, it had been an uneventful afters shift and as I was wheeling my bike out of the bike shed I contemplated the route home. Most of the week I've only cycled the minimum (there & back) so I chose my evening alternative route which gives me a couple of extra 'k's with the option of a nice little climb at the end.

The ride starts with a decent towards the city centre, I'd manage to safely get past the deadly tram tracks (a cyclists' nemesis) and was descending at a steady pace when without warning a man walked out into the road, into my path. He turned to look at me, I think at that point he'd not noticed me before. I think I shouted out as I squeezed the brakes and pushed my bodyweight towards the rear but it was all so fast I'm not 100% sure. I felt the impact but at first thought I was going to be OK and push thro him. Then I went down, I just remember rolling on the road and seeing my front wheel flying through the air. I remember seeing that the wheel was bent and my heart sinking that my bike was not getting out of this unscathed.

I don't know exactly how long it took me to pick myself off the road, I became aware of pain in my shoulder. Suddenly there were people around me asking if I was OK. I saw the other guy get up, pick up his baseball cap up off the road and bugger off swiftly. I wasn't in a position to do anything about that.

There was one lady who was very helpful and a bloke who had a van who ran me home with my bike. I lost my water bottle and my glasses (which were thrown from my face) were crushed by a passing taxi.

Once home it became obvious that something wasn't right with my shoulder so Morticia took me over to A & E to get it checked out. I arrived at the hospital about 22:30. I wasn't seen until about 3:30am! It was then I got the bad news about the break. It feels like I've only just gotten over the collision last year and now I'm back to square one.