Friday 17 August 2018

1808.17 CAR TETRIS

Ultimately the most stressful part of the lead up to any holiday is the packing and preparation before setting off, at least it is for my good lady wife - Morticia. She panics about all aspects of the process, I guess I get it easy but I've always had the attitude that if it's not sorted then don't worry.

I had 3 days of work to get through, which is hard. Trying to concentrate on doing your job when the holiday is looming is practically impossible - thankfully my colleagues know I'm on the wind down and know how important my annual trip is and don't expect too much.

My list of tasks as usual consist of;
  1. The annual count and evaluation of my collection of underpants.
  2. Pack said underpants.
  3. Facilitate the shopping trip to buy enough food for 2 months - in actual fact this will be snacks for the journey.
  4. Take the car to the Eastern European car wash.
  5. Pack other clothes.
  6. Offer soothing and calming words to a stressing out Morticia.
  7. Keep out of the way of a now more angry Morticia.
  8. Hoover the car and take out all the crap in the boot.
  9. Help clean the house.
  10. Try not to eat any of the food mountain because it's all for the journey.
  11. Make sure we have enough cat food and litter to leave.
  12. Water my Venus Fly Trap (and try and catch it some flies to chew on).
  13. Gather all the luggage into the living room.
  14. Plan to go to bed early so we can be fresh for the morning (knowing that this will never happen).
  15. Wake up first and be responsible for motivating everyone despite having to drive the majority of the way!
Only then when all this has been done will I get to play the frustrating game of car tetris. Finding the optimum pattern of fitting practically everything your wife owns plus your minimum offering into the boot of car is a definite skill. Then and only then can we depart.

Next stop Wales (well perhaps Chester Services for a piss)!

Ni all aros i gyrraedd.

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